The bikes of Amsterdam inspire me!
In my last blog post, I told you about the bike that got away: a mint green Schwinn hybrid. All the other bikes on Craigslist did not compare to it. It became the holy grail of all bicycles! It fulfilled all the present day criteria for my bike purchase today. It also fulfilled all the little girl wishes too!
There is always a back story…
You see, when I was a little girl, as a twin, my mom had to buy two of everything at one time. She often had to make choices that agreed with her budget instead of our wishes. Mom bought my bike from Montgomery Ward–a now defunct department store–where she had a credit card. She probably spent the next year paying off two bikes for my twin sister and me. Secretly, I wished for a “Schwinn” like the ones on the TV commercials.
Don’t get me wrong, I was so grateful for any bike, but secretly just a little disappointed that I did not get the Schwinn I wished for. And now, a full 50 years later, I realized I had the opportunity to change that disappointed little girl’s thoughts! My grown up self could finally buy what my young self really wanted. “Chrissie,” my inner child, was overjoyed!
Have you ever had that kind of experience? Where you knew you were meeting the needs of your younger self? Maybe by visiting a place from your childhood as an adult and being flooded by memories of a younger you? Or eating a favorite meal as a grown up and re-experiencing every detail of the way it tasted, smelled, felt in your mouth and tummy and remembering a simpler time?
Your childhood memories are important treasures. You can unlock them with a smell, a sight, a tone in a stranger’s voice. They can be stored up in your heart, or they can be shared. They can flood you with warmth and good feelings or drown you with darkness. But we have the ability to change the inner dialog–even 50 years later! We can enter the memory and change the outcome.
In an article entitled, It is never too late to have a happy childhood
, Betty Phillips suggests that we can “re-parent” ourselves. We can provide the guidance and care that our parents may have missed or been unable to afford. Showing kindness to our younger selves, even for seemingly insignificant things like a second-hand bike, can provide comfort and help you build your own foundation of self care. It can help you change the inner dialog. Because it really is never too late to have a happy childhood.
This bike was much more important than ever imagined!
Colossians 3:12 says: “…as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Isn’t it important to show love, compassion and kindness, gentleness and patience to ourselves first? Similar to re-parenting ourselves? That kind of self-care changes outcomes for us, and our relationships with other generations. It takes blame off others and brings the joy of healing and support to our weakened places so we can grow stronger.
Chrissie needs a Schwinn to change the outcome, to modify her inner dialog, to provide what Mom couldn’t. I widened my search to include outlying areas and I ventured onto other sites. New bikes were added every day. How far would I be willing to go to find the bike Chrissie wished for? to re-parent Chrissie?
What outcome would you like to change for your younger self? And what are you willing to do to change an experience for the child inside you? How far would you be willing to go?