There is a generational issue in the Bible that explains some of this for us. King Saul was trying desperately to keep his place on the throne while David, the young warrior, God’s chosen successor to Saul’s throne, was growing more capable of taking over every day. Saul planned to assassinate David so he could maintain his own power and pass it on to his son Jonathan. David caught wind of Saul’s plan and hid from Saul! Interestingly, it was Saul’s son, Jonathan (also David’s best friend) who functioned as mediator. During the course of this drama, David had opportunities to kill Saul: in the wilderness, in his sleep, and in a cave while he relieved his bladder. But each time, David showed his elder king mercy and respect. Instead of killing Saul, David allowed Saul to live.
To my post-modern readers: You are going to do things differently and sometimes not at all the way older people expect, like David. You will make the world a better place, just like previous generations did in their time. But just so you don’t get too big for your britches as you embrace your role in history, David made good decisions in his youth and spiraled out of control during his midlife crisis. Don’t get too judgy.
Adulting Tips for Everyone:
- Lead with Love. Just because God says so. Oh! and because it works.
- Choose your best thoughts. If you are listening to a voice that condemns someone else, it’s most likely an exaggeration. If it is a true threat, God is capable of providing an escape.
- Communicate honestly. Even if it hurts you, but not if it hurts others.
- Respect. Because we can’t move forward without it.
- Find a mediator. In a sticky situation, find your Jonathan.
- Be authentic. No one in any age group likes a phony.
- Honor each others’ best means of communication: digital or face-to-face. Be brief and above all else, be kind.
- On the days you just can’t adult, wear this T-shirt. At least give a warning to the peeps in your circle!